


Kids are great, Avenger kids...not so great? (Naw they're frickin awesome)

by PhantomStorm



Series: Avenger Kid-fics [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-10-20
Packaged: 2018-12-17 00:13:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11839980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhantomStorm/pseuds/PhantomStorm
Summary: Tony and Sam are called by Fury for some workFury gives them back as kidsLoki's a kid too.Fluff and things ensue.Tony's boyfriends are conflictedTony and Loki are having the time of their livesSam is killing Steve with his cutenessDid I mention Nick is a kid too?If you wanna know why, read the notes





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So Loki's spell backfired and they all became kids.
> 
> They're all 4 yrs old fyi

It was suppose to be a normal day. Sam and Tony were called by Fury and were supposed to be back by lunch. The rest of the Avengers were on their rare day off. Life seemed good. That is, until Pepper showed up with a leash full of children wearing over-sized shirts. And yes, I said leash. A hyperactive Tony was babbling away, mashing English and Italian together as he spoke and constantly running around and straining against his harness. Sam was copying the hell out of Stark (minus the Italian) and overall making Pepper's job 10 times harder. Loki was sitting in her arms, away from the chaos and Fury was also on a leash, chasing them around and occasionally yelling "STOP RUNNING AROUND! WHAT ARE YOU GUYS? CHILDREN?" (smooth Fury, calling them children while you're one too. Smooth)

"Will ONE OF YOU COME SAVE ME?!!?!?!?!" Pepper yelled as the Avengers seemed to finally notice her entrance. The rest of the team had been sitting back and watching The Hunger Games (cuz it was Clint's turn to pick). Bucky was the first to react, jumping off the couch and fleeing to the other side of the room. Hiding so he wouldn't scare the kids. (Why Bucky? You is a big ol' teddy bear on the inside)

Casting a "really?" look at his friend, Steve got up to go and see what Pepper needed help with, closely followed by intrigued Natasha and confused Bruce. Clint was too busy watching Katniss shoot down bad guys.

"WHOA!" Steve yelped looking at the kids. His yelp froze the kids in their tracks for about a millisecond before they whipped around and saw the trio. "STEBE!" Sam squealed and glanced over at Tony. Tony gave a nod and expertly undid Sam's harness, allowing Sam to launch himself at Steve. "What? Oh for gods sake, ANTHONY!" Pepper scolded. Tony just giggled and undid his own, charging away. "No no no no no no! Someone catch him before he finds  _ANYTHING_ dangerous!" Pepper commanded, pointing her free hand at the small boy. Natasha automatically stooped down and scooped up the wriggling child. "No Tasha! Down! Wansa finds Bucky and Feathers!" Tony pouted.

At the sound of his horrid, Tony given nick-name, Clint tore his gaze from the TV and looked over at the entry-way in which they were all standing. Tony finally caught sight of Clint and shouted happily. "Feathers! Feathers!" Clint's shock morphed into the biggest grin. Hopping off the couch he sauntered over and looked at the miniaturized child that was his boyfriend. "Hey bub, whats goin on?" he asked and took him from Nat. "Loki made a magicky ball that went  _POOF_ _!_ and then all of us inside da woom went  _shoom_ and Tada!" Tony explained. Clint nodded, while all the others looked confused as hell. "You understood that?" Natasha asked skeptically. Clint and Tony made overly exaggerated shocked expressions (damn they looked identical) and Clint gasped "The famous assassin who knows, who knows how many languages cannot understand simple child languages?" Tony gasped along with Clint, then at Natasha's (playful) glare, he broke down into a fit of giggles. 

"So what did he say?" Bruce asked, butting in. "Easy" Clint laughed, "Fury, Tony, Sam, and Loki were all in the same room when Loki did some magic that backfired and turned them all into kids." Tony nodded in agreement.

Everyone standing there looked stunned (Except Pepper cuz she heard from Coulson, her boyfriend)

"Whe Bucky?" Tony asked.

Sam and Loki gasped. 

Bucky had seemingly materialized out of nowhere behind Clint and had covered Tony's eyes asking "guess who Tony" in a terrible falsetto. It sent Tony into another fit of giggles as he put his tiny hands over Bucky's massive ones and and said, "It's my Winnie!" Tony turned and stretched his arms out towards Bucky. 

"Up! Winnie, Up!" Tony commanded still giggling (damn did this kid ever stop giggling?) Bucky picked up Tony and held him on his metal arm. Honestly, Tony was so small he could sit on Bucky's one arm and still be light

As this was going on, Sam had began climbing Steve Koala style and had finally reached Steve's shoulder. He sat on it and waved down at Tony. "I tawwer dan you Tonesy!" Sam said, puffing his chest out with pride. "Noooooo! Winnie higher! We gotsa beat dem!  _Hiiiiigher!"_ Tony said with determination. Bucky and Clint shared a look and Clint quickly jumped up and sat on Bucky's shoulders, picking up Tony and settling him on top of his own shoulders. 

Sam gasped as Tony now towered over him and Steve. "No faiwe Tonesy! You gots two fwens!" Tony giggled (yup more giggling) "Dats cuz evewyone wuvs me!" Tony spread his hands out and puffed up his scrawny chest.

"Come down an fight me Tonesy!"

"You can't make me Sammy!"

"I beats you no pwobwem"

"Nu uh"

"Uh huh"

"Nu uh"

"Uh huh"

"Nu..." "Okay! Enough!" Bruce said calmly, taking Sam and gesturing for Clint to pass him Tony. Right when he finally stopped them from fighting, Fury just  _had_ to speak. "Y'all loosas cant beat  __me!" They all groaned out loud as Sam and Tony teamed up and began arguing with Fury.

"What are we gonna do?" Natasha sighed.


	2. How To Deal With Smol Avengers (Rhodes and Vision got this down)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky, Steve and Clint pray for someone to help them (someone come save them they cant kids)
> 
> Clint doesnt have a secret fam ok?
> 
> Rhodey and Vision save them

Thor came the next day and is now looking for a cure. (mind you, he  _sucks_ at magic, that's Loki's job) He had taken Loki with him to the Lady Jane's apartment and was currently working on it there. 

Bruce had followed along to see if he could help. (Even though he's a science guy)

Natasha and Maria had come to save them from Fury who had taken it upon himself to make sure they were constantly working.

So basically Clint and Bucky were in Stark Tower (Avengers Tower I mean, my bad) with their tiny Tony and Steve was trying to deal with his small Sam. Tony was currently playing hide and seek and Bucky already found Clint, but oddly enough. Couldn't. Find. TONY. I know right? Major assassin along with a super spy couldn't find a 4 year old Tony. (The world is ending guys)

"Okay Tony you  _win!"_ Clint called, looking around the living-room. Bucky was searching their bedroom. "If you're on another floor that's cheating Tony!" Bucky called out. They duo kept looking in every possible spot a 4 year old could hide.  _BIG_ mistake, for everyone knows a tiny Tony does not mean he is any less Tony like. (lol great explanation)

They really should'a looked up when they heard the door open. Clint and Bucky were looking around muttering to themselves when suddenly a hand tapped Clint's shoulder. Clint whirled around and threw a punch at his tapper. Said tapper caught the punch and whispered "What are you looking for?" Clint finally registered who was speaking and saw that Rhodes had come back a week early. "Oh, hey man" he whispered back. Bucky then came over and said "I cant find him." "Find who?" Rhodes asked. "Tony" they both replied. 

Rhodes thought for a moment, then it seemed to click. "That's why Vision flew ahead" he chuckled. Standing up fully he cupped his hands like a megaphone and called, "Guess who Tonio!" 

"I dun wike dat name platypus!" cried an (pretend) angry voice from the ceiling. 

They all looked up and Vision sighed, "I told you we needed to be quiet" and Tony giggled. "Sowwy Javis"

 They looked at one another as Vision brought down their Tiny Tony. "Platypus!" Tony squealed and startled Vision as he launched himself at an expectant Rhodey. "Hey Tones, wassup?" Rhodey asked seemingly unfazed by his friend's sudden small size. Tony just snuggled closer to Rhodey and attempted to wrap his arms around him (failing cuz he got tiny lil arms) Bucky and Clint greeted Vision before flopping down onto the couch with the biggest sigh. "What seems to be troubling you?" Vision asked the two men. "Kids. Are. TIRING!" They groaned and caused Rhodey and Vision to chuckle. "No, really! You should see Cap try to wrangle Sam to bed!" Clint pointed out. "It was hilarious though" Bucky added with a smirk. Just as Vision was about to reply, the door opened and in came a speeding Sam followed by an exhausted Steve. "TOOOONEEEESYYYYYYYY" Sam yelled as he charged over to Rhodey. When Sam stopped and looked at who was holding Tony he stood straight and saluted the Colonel. Chuckling, Rhodey saluted back.

"Help" Steve mouthed and Clint just shrugged while Bucky smirked.

"Hello Colonel, Vision" Steve greeted, flopping down on the couch with them. "Captain" Rhodey replied. Vision was a bit preoccupied since Sam had decided to climb Vision's cape Koala style (again). 

"Ah, yes greetings Captain" he replied when he had successfully extracted Sam from his cape. When the two held the now silent children Rogers, Barnes, and Barton all got up and slowly snuck around them. When the children didn't notice the trio took the opportunity and sprinted out of the room. Before it closed they all yelled something at Vision and Rhodes.

"Watch them for us!"

"Good Luck!"

"Thank you! We need sleep!"

Baffled, Rhodey turned to Vision.

What's going to happen?


	3. Rhodey and Vision are magic (no seriously they are)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bad summary hah

Rhodey and Vision were confused, but oddly, didn't seem to mind. Tony and Sam looked around for their boyfriends and were shocked to see them gone. "Where Stebe?" Sam asked. (Vision is holding him by his ankle and Sam is pulling a ninja pose upside down) 

"Uh...well" Rhodey began

"I think it would be unwise to inform them of the Captain's whereabouts." Vision cut-in.

"Right" Rhodey replied.

Tony on the other hand was dead silent. Eyes wide, staring at the door. "They stiw wike me wight?" Tony mumbled nervously. Rhodey and Vision's eyes snapped over to Tony. He was sitting in Rhodey's arm's, looking very uncertain, twisting the hem of his shirt. "Of course they still like you" Rhodey laughed and the smile seemed to lighten Tony just a tad. He still had a frown though. Vision placed Sam down before he fainted and lifted Tony out of Rhodey's hands. 

"They just need to rest...Tony."

Tony immediately brightened which caused Vision to look at him skeptically. His gaze then went to the Colonel for an explanation and saw that he was open-mouthed with shock. Vision looked back to Tony and Tony clued in that he better explain. "You sayed my name!" he giggled happily.

Vision was stunned. "Saying...your name makes you...happy?" Tony nodded vigorously.

"You'se neba say my name name." Tony said.

Sam finally decided to say something, "I wanna play!"

Rhodey smiled evilly and scooped Sam up. "I'm going to  _EAT YOU!"_ "NOOOOOOOOOOOO" He squealed, and wriggled as hard as he could. "Nom nom nom!" Rhodey growled pretending to bite Sam, instead he tickled him. "TONESY HEEEEELLPPPP MEEEEEEE!" Sam laughed, reaching for Tony's hand. 

"Less go Jabis!" Tony declared. Swinging Tony under one arm Vision flew forward and winked at Rhodey. Rhodey nodded back and suddenly tossed Sam into the air. "WHOAAAAAA!" he yelled. "I'm a buurd! I' a plaaane! No, I supa Facon!" Sam squealed determinedly. Tony laughed. "You gon fawwl Sammy!" And true to that statement, Sam took a nose-dive and landed into the awaiting arms of Vision.

"Now we escape!" Tony giggles and Vision phases them through the wall and leaves Rhodey standing by himself. It finally clicked in his head and he yelped "WAIT!" Sprinting out the door and veering around the corner and right through Vision. Sam and Tony were laughing hysterically now and even Vision cracked a smile. Rhodey smirked and thats when a  _very tired_ looking Cap came out the door and straight into Rhodey. They both fell to the floor and Sam yelled "STEBE!" and slid out of Vision's grasp. "STEBE! STEBE! STEBE!" he cried, launching himself at him.

Steve yawned. "Hey there lil' guy," he said, patting Sam's head. Tony looked at all the other doors expectantly. "Feathers? Winnie?" he called softly. When no reply came he turned and buried his face into Vision's chest. Vision hugged him close and told him softly, "It's okay. They're only sleeping." 

They left the sleeping quarters and went back to the living room for a movie. 

Tony fell asleep half-way through.

~a few hours later~

"Toooonyyyyyyy!" Clint called as he sauntered into the room. Bucky followed closely behind, running a hand through his bed-head. "Shhh!" Rhodey scolded, rocking Tony back and forth. 

Clint and Bucky leaned in for a look at the adorable lil baby that was Tony. Bucky whispered "Hey babe, wake up." Slowly Tony stirred. Turning his head slowly, he peeked open his eyes. "Hey baby bear!" Clint smiled and kissed his forehead. "rauur" he mumbled, curling his hands into little claws. Clint froze, eyes widening. He stumbled back a step and hung his mouth open. Confused, Bucky went closer and Tony did it again, louder this time. "RAuuuur!" Bucky did the exact same thing, stumbling back into Clint and clutching his heart like he was dying.

"F. R. I. D. A. Y.?" Rhodey called, "I hope you took photos of this, cuz i'm going to want them." "Pictures and video Colonel Rhodes" F. R. I. D. A. Y. replied. "Please send them to me and title it "How to Break Assasins." Rhodey laughed. "All done Colonel," you could hear the laugh in her voice.

Looking down at Tony he smiled, "You're gonna want that video to eh?" "Rauur!" he giggled happily.

Steve was in hysterics on the couch. "You bwoke dem Tony! Bwoken!" Sam called.

Tony gasped. "NO! DUN BWEAK! I SOWWY!!" Tony was on the verge of tears. Clint and Bucky snapped out of it and came over to cradle their lil' baby.

(Good job Tony. Good job)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry its bad! my brain died. please still read though. thanks! kudos and comments!


End file.
